Wedding nerves

So, today is Friday 1st August 2014. We get married on Friday 29th August, which is 28 days time, exactly 4 weeks, its now august and 'the month we get married' and sad to say it but my adrenaline has gone into overdrive. The last few days I've been anxious, irritable, short tempered, impatient, not sleeping properly, having no appetite and like I can't shake that nervous feeling in my stomach every time I think about the wedding - which is constantly at this point - every one I see asks if we're "All ready for the big day?" I go to bed thinking about it and it is my first waking thought every morning.

I cannot keep up this level of anxiety for 4 weeks. It may kill me.

So I decided to read up on ways to control wedding nerves, which from what I've read most people don't suffer from until the night before or the day of the wedding because they're 'so busy' doing all the preparations before that they don't have time to get nervous.

This is not so for me, it is 4 weeks to go and I'm completely ready - obviously the last week of the wedding there are a few things to do such as pick up the suits, drop off the favours and make sure everything is at the venue but I'm off work that week and so are some of my nearest and dearest so I'm not worried about anything like that.

I have know weddings where they were cutting out the place-names the night before in a blind panic - Why on earth would you leave it that late? Mine have been done for weeks. And I think that is the problem, I can be a bit of a control freak - if I had not made all the artsy-craftsy stuff by now I would be panicking that I would run out of time and forget something, but I'm not, its done, I have time to spot anything I might have missed and any changes I need to make.

And there in lies the issue, I have too much time to think about it now, I'm not crazy busy preparing stuff, I'm not even crazy busy with my own day-to-day life as I've been working my basic hours at work for a couple of weeks and I finish work in 2 weeks (after the wedding I'm starting uni full time so leaving my job just before the wedding makes sense) Other than thinking about the wedding I have very little else to do with myself.

Anyway...read a few various blogs about calming nerves. They're all fairly obvious and basic techniques which I have used to try and control my panic attacks for years - the 'try' in that sentence worries me more as I never find any of them to be that effective for very long when I am in full panic mode.

Some of the top tips are a bit rubbish to be honest...drinking alcohol seems to be most peoples popular way of 'taking the edge off' but this doesn't work for me as I don't really drink and alcohol overstimulates my other fears and anxieties - so being a lushy bride is not really an option for me.

Saying 'Relax and Let go' is also a rubbish tip - if I could just 'Relax and Let go' then I wouldn't be googling relaxation tips now would I?

Deep breathing is obvious but effective - There are a million and one different breathing techniques to try, I have found 'square breathing' quite effective (breath in for 3 seconds, hold for 3 seconds, breath out for 3 seconds, hold for 3 seconds) however the 'hold for 3 seconds after you breath out does sometimes leave me feeling a little light headed!

I find it useful to grasp my wrist (- not as random as you think!) there is a pressure point in your wrist which subsides feelings of nausea ((if you ever seen 'travel sickness bracelets/wristbands they are supposed to press on this pressure point)) and I find the brief moment when you grasp it initially seems to drop my blood pressure and allows a moment of calm as your stomach is doing backflips.

The best advice I read is to put it into perspective - remember why you're there and what really matters. Write down what your worries are and rationalise ways to avoid them or deal with them if these problems do arise and share the concerns with your nearest and dearest because letting them fester will make it worse. I have 'unloaded' an awful lot on Andrew, but less so with others and I maybe need to collar my parents and have a bit of a word.

Links to blogs I read:

http://www.getwed.com/articles/top-10-tips-to-calm-last-minute-wedding-nerves-gb-en/

http://www.weddingideasmag.com/wedding-day-nerves-how-to-stay-calm/#.U9s-WpV0yP8